Saturday, 24 November 2018

My funeral

Travelling to a friend's funeral this week set me thinking.

We haven't seen this friend for a year or two, and yet we travelled to her funeral. It was less than two and a half hours' journey; why had we left it so long? And then I thought of all the other people I love but whom I haven't seen for a while. A couple of days ago,  I was speaking to a close friend I haven't seen for about two years, and we both agreed that we would certainly go to each other's funerals.
So why leave it until then? I have resolved to see more of my friends as soon as possible. While we're all still alive.

 As for my own funeral, I'd like to hold it now. While I'm still around to enjoy it. A kind of pre-funeral; putting the fun back into funerals. Why not? I could even start a business....

15 comments:

  1. I can remember those sort of parties from my youth. Bodies lying about all over the place. Great they were.

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  2. Putting the fun back into funerals... I like that!
    I make a conscious effort to seeing my friends, and one way to achieve this is that with a group of "girls" we have a regular appointment, the first Friday of the month. Not all of us are there every time, but it is a fixed date in our diaries and gives us a chance to see each other several times a year.

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    1. That’s a lovely idea, Meike, but I like to see my friends one at a time. Most of them don’t even know each other!

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  3. When our son died he had already organised the celebration of his death: no funeral for him but a celebration of the life he had had. Indeed the 'funerals' of each of my dear friends who have died recently were both very moving for their celebration of lives lived. We were not allowed to wallow in self-pity for our loss.

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    1. I love the sound of that, Graham, but isn’t there a difference between grieving and self pity?

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    2. In my experience, funerals, weddings, and all sorts of gatherings take on a life of their own, no matter how people try to orchestrate them. Some of the happiest wedding receptions included a brawl, and some of the funerals for people I was saddest to lose ended up being reunions of sorts, bringing smiles amid the tears.

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    3. Very good points, Mrs. S. Thank you!

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  4. I've always liked the idea of a celebration of someone's life rather than a solemn funeral. How right you are about seeing people when they're still alive!

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    1. Thanks, Rosemary. However, I still feel that at real (ie post death!) funeral, people,should be allowed to grieve. I rather envy those who howl and weep their pain round a funeral pyre. We British are so terribly retrained and polite!

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  5. Long ago I gave up on funerals, memorials, celebrations and the lot, and opted for a simple cremation (as if I'd have a choice being dead!) and hope my ashes will be scattered to the four winds by whomever is willing to perform that task.
    I'm all for keeping in touch with family and old friends while we are able to converse.

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    1. How very sensible, Jill! And for help in keeping in touch after your death, do read my newest post. I’m sure it will be helpful...

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    2. Thank you Frances. I just read your latest post and I had a chuckle or two.

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    3. I'm so glad it helped, Jill. After all, what else are (blog) friends for?

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  6. Mary Wesley used that as the start of one of her books, didn't she? The heroine was attracted by an advertisement for *so and so's* fun funerals. It turned out to be a misprint for fine funerals, but the scene had been set!

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