Friday 21 December 2018

I am a bald, impotent, randy man

Oh, the downside of having a name which (spelled differently) could be that of a man.

For some time, I’ve  been inundated with emails from comapanies offering to increase the size of my penis (or improve the performance of the one I’ve apparently got) and to introduce me to voluptuous young women from the East. Now, these people have decided that I’m bald, as well, and are offering me a variety of hair restoring products (my hair is actually quite thick). 

In vain do I send messages to say that I AM A WOMAN, but these are always ignored. So I’ll just have to put up with it.

Next time around, I’ve decided I shall simply be called Mary 🙂

7 comments:

  1. Our dog Jethro, who has been dead for five years, continues to receive mail from the Veteran's Administration and inquiries from the Cremation Society.

    You made me laugh out loud today!

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    1. These people can be very insensitive, RWP. But I’m glad I cheered you up 🙂

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  2. Frances, I must fit into the same category for the senders of such emails... my real name never appears in those mails, as it is not part of my email address, and so they can not mistake Meike for Mike (as does happen).
    Of course you were not serious when you said you reply to their messages to say that you are a woman, right?

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    1. Of course I was serious, Meike. With a name like Garrood (which no one can spell) and an ambiguous first name, I get pretty fed up!

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    2. But... but... but you know that replying to spam emails only confirms to the sender that this particular email address is actively being used by a real person, and that secures you a top spot their mailing list for ever...

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  3. Your posts always make me smile, Frances. Wishing you and yours a wonderful Christmas season.

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