Greetings cards (again)

My favourite is still "Happy Easter from the Dog", but here's one that comes pretty close:

Happy birthday to my partner's friend.

Dear friend of my partner
On whose behalf I have bought this card
You'd think he'd find time to buy one himself
But being male he find it too hard.

There's more to this "poem", but I was getting odd looks as I copied it down in the newsagent's (I certainly wasn't going to buy it). So - come on all you (we) guys who want to get into print (and presumably earn some money). Ridiculous subject apart, we HAVE to be able to do better than this. In fact I'd love to run another competition, but it's getting expensive! (Sorry, Joanna. I've bought the tea towel, and it will be on its way by tomorrow.)