Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Anniversary

Today would have been my 42nd wedding anniversary. I've now had as many anniversaries without him as I had with him. It used to be our day; now it is just mine.

I always think of him on this day; of our beautiful wedding in a pretty Cambridge college chapel, the flower arrangement that collapsed just before the service, the sweet peas worn by all the men and in my bouquet, my then fifteen-year-old brother disappearing and finding a funfair, where he won a coconut.

Everyone else has moved on, more or less, and I am the only one who is remembering today. And that is how it should be.

But I shall always love him, and be grateful for the too-short time we had together. Always.

25 comments:

  1. Dear Frances, this was very touching. I know I make mention of my late husband sometimes on my blog or in comments, and like you, I am grateful for the time we had together, even though it were only 10 years, 4 1/2 of which we were married. In Steve's case, I know that my mother and his mother also think of him more than usual on such days as our wedding anniversary or his birthday, and my sister and his sisters probably, too.
    We'd have had our 7th wedding anniversary this year.

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    1. Thank you, Meike. So sad that you had such a tragically short time together.

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  2. Hugs:) You must be very special to have achieved such a lasting love. Your emotional well runs deep.

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    1. Thank you so much. I think I have been lucky. We had only known each other five months. But I have been very fortunate in marrying happily for the second time.

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  3. Aaaw, Frances.

    There was a snag with our wedding arrangements today - it seemed like a big deal and I was a little upset, but you've made me see it isn't really important.

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    1. Patsy, you are sweet. I hope your glitch was temporary, and now sorted. You must be getting very excited!

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    2. I am excited! I've decided not to let the things that don't turn out how I want to spoil everything else.

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  4. I'm really , really moved by your post, Frances. Your words are so beautiful and touching. I especially love the image I have of your brother finding the fair and winning his coconut.

    Thank you for sharing these memories with us. x

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    1. Thank you, Joanna. I just suddenly wanted to write it down. Five minutes before, I wasn't thinking of writing about it at all. I suppose it was my way of marking the date.

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  5. For once I have no words: tears but no words.

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    1. Thank you, GB. What kind followers i have. I am very touched.

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  6. My thoughts are with you Francis, my husband passed away 7 years ago, his birthday was the day after mine, while it made for fun double two day parties, now i can hardly celebrate mine. Its getting better though.
    Its good to be able to write about it, into the blogisphere, for one it makes me feel less alone in my situation. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Thank you. It's all still very fresh for you, isn't it. The best analogy I've heard is that over time, it turns from a wound into a scar. I'm so sorry for what you have been and are going through.

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  7. A very touching post, Frances, and some lovely images of that special day.

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    1. Thank you, Rosemary. Until I started the post, I'd forgotten about the coconut!

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  8. My thoughts are with you, Frances.

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  9. A lovely, moving post, Frances x

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  10. Thank you, Teresa. Rather self-indulgent, and totally unplanned. But better than going all sentimental over my family, anyway!

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  11. That really moved me Frances. Thanks for sharing, and glad to know that you were lucky enough to find someone else to share your life with.

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  12. Very moving Frances. And it reminds me again how very fortunate I am - Agnes and I were married 43 years ago last May (on a beautiful sunny day in Dublin) and we are still going strong with one or two scares along the way. We take nothing for granted, and if one of us sets out from the front door without the other we do make an expression of our love. Just in case it might be our last ...

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    1. Thank you. I never take anything for granted now. A hard lesson...

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