Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Anniversary

Today would have been my 42nd wedding anniversary. I've now had as many anniversaries without him as I had with him. It used to be our day; now it is just mine.

I always think of him on this day; of our beautiful wedding in a pretty Cambridge college chapel, the flower arrangement that collapsed just before the service, the sweet peas worn by all the men and in my bouquet, my then fifteen-year-old brother disappearing and finding a funfair, where he won a coconut.

Everyone else has moved on, more or less, and I am the only one who is remembering today. And that is how it should be.

But I shall always love him, and be grateful for the too-short time we had together. Always.
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23 comments:

  1. Librarian4 July 2012 at 18:30

    Dear Frances, this was very touching. I know I make mention of my late husband sometimes on my blog or in comments, and like you, I am grateful for the time we had together, even though it were only 10 years, 4 1/2 of which we were married. In Steve's case, I know that my mother and his mother also think of him more than usual on such days as our wedding anniversary or his birthday, and my sister and his sisters probably, too.
    We'd have had our 7th wedding anniversary this year.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:23

      Thank you, Meike. So sad that you had such a tragically short time together.

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  2. Unknown4 July 2012 at 19:05

    Beautiful post
    lx

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  3. English Rider4 July 2012 at 19:36

    Hugs:) You must be very special to have achieved such a lasting love. Your emotional well runs deep.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:26

      Thank you so much. I think I have been lucky. We had only known each other five months. But I have been very fortunate in marrying happily for the second time.

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  4. Patsy4 July 2012 at 19:53

    Aaaw, Frances.

    There was a snag with our wedding arrangements today - it seemed like a big deal and I was a little upset, but you've made me see it isn't really important.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:27

      Patsy, you are sweet. I hope your glitch was temporary, and now sorted. You must be getting very excited!

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    2. Patsy5 July 2012 at 19:37

      I am excited! I've decided not to let the things that don't turn out how I want to spoil everything else.

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  5. Joanna4 July 2012 at 19:59

    I'm really , really moved by your post, Frances. Your words are so beautiful and touching. I especially love the image I have of your brother finding the fair and winning his coconut.

    Thank you for sharing these memories with us. x

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:29

      Thank you, Joanna. I just suddenly wanted to write it down. Five minutes before, I wasn't thinking of writing about it at all. I suppose it was my way of marking the date.

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  6. Graham Edwards4 July 2012 at 21:06

    For once I have no words: tears but no words.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:30

      Thank you, GB. What kind followers i have. I am very touched.

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  7. The Cranky Crone, she lives alone!4 July 2012 at 22:57

    My thoughts are with you Francis, my husband passed away 7 years ago, his birthday was the day after mine, while it made for fun double two day parties, now i can hardly celebrate mine. Its getting better though.
    Its good to be able to write about it, into the blogisphere, for one it makes me feel less alone in my situation. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:35

      Thank you. It's all still very fresh for you, isn't it. The best analogy I've heard is that over time, it turns from a wound into a scar. I'm so sorry for what you have been and are going through.

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  8. Rosemary Gemmell5 July 2012 at 11:21

    A very touching post, Frances, and some lovely images of that special day.

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    1. Frances Garrood5 July 2012 at 11:36

      Thank you, Rosemary. Until I started the post, I'd forgotten about the coconut!

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  9. Lynne Hackles5 July 2012 at 11:31

    My thoughts are with you, Frances.

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  10. Teresa Ashby6 July 2012 at 09:20

    A lovely, moving post, Frances x

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  11. Frances Garrood6 July 2012 at 11:19

    Thank you, Teresa. Rather self-indulgent, and totally unplanned. But better than going all sentimental over my family, anyway!

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  12. Maggie May6 July 2012 at 13:07

    That really moved me Frances. Thanks for sharing, and glad to know that you were lucky enough to find someone else to share your life with.

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  13. Dr Henry Tegner9 July 2012 at 18:19

    Very moving Frances. And it reminds me again how very fortunate I am - Agnes and I were married 43 years ago last May (on a beautiful sunny day in Dublin) and we are still going strong with one or two scares along the way. We take nothing for granted, and if one of us sets out from the front door without the other we do make an expression of our love. Just in case it might be our last ...

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    1. Frances Garrood9 July 2012 at 22:28

      Thank you. I never take anything for granted now. A hard lesson...

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