Monday 21 July 2014

Open letter to Boden


Dear Boden,

I don't often buy your clothes, becaue they don't really suit me. I do, however, buy your children's clothes as presents, because they are gorgeous, and have just sent for a pair of shoes in your sale.So far so good.

But do you have to be so ridiculously over the top about it all? When I order something, you go into paroxyms of faux delight, and today I received an exceptionally silly email to tell me: hip hooray! Your order is on its way.... we're shifting heaven and earth to deliver your spotty parcel as soon as possible.

In answer to the last, no you're not. Your packing department are just packing my stuff up, as they always do, and putting it in the post. I don't need all this gratuitous jollity. I'm not a child. I'm a grown-up, with a credit card of my own (you should know that. You've just taken money from it). Moreover, if I don't use you for while, I get plaintive little emails saying how much you miss me. Again, not true. You have no idea who I am (apart from name and credit card). You would just like a bit more of my custom.

Boden, you provide merchandise; I'm a customer. Our relationship is purely professional. Now, get over it.


Yours etc.

26 comments:

  1. I've not dealt with this company, but I've come across others who behave in a similar way. It's annoying.

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    1. These are the worst, Patsy. But needs must...

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  2. Replies
    1. Just keep off their mailing list, L. That way madness lies!

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  3. Hey, How many times do I have to say relax, or CHILL. Don't know what Chill means. It's a word my son's girl friend uses.Apart from sitting about looking pretty. She says chill if washing up has to be done.
    I guess if your clothes don't fit you just send them back. Say Chill.
    I think CHILL means F'off. Kids do work language to their advantage.

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    1. A, but you didn't sound so chilled when that sexy camera person moved away, Adrian. Pots and kettles?

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  4. Never heard the name Boden until just now, but they are not the only ones being so fake over-enthusiastic about it. For me, plain facts will do any time. (Such as "We have received your order/payment" and "Your order has been shipped".
    A bit of enthusiasm is fine when you, like me, have been trying on a dress upon suggestion of a really capable saleswoman and the dress really suits you to perfection - and she is happy about having chosen just the right one for you, and can see in your face that you are equally happy and will make the purchase (adding to her bonus account). I have no problem with that, as long as it is honest (and we can always tell, can't we, if someone is not honest with us).

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    1. That amused me, Frances, as I have just unwrapped my 'lovingly packaged' dress from said company that makes me look pregnant!

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    2. Meike, there's no one quite like Boden for sheer silliness. I have no idea why they do it.

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    3. Wendy, I hope you're sending it back?

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  5. I don't order online but did recently send for three items from Cotton Traders with a cheque in the post. I received a letter to say two items are unavailable and the third was being dispatched. That was two weeks ago. Still nothing, which confirms the reason why I never order anything by post.

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    1. Maggie, I send a lot of things back, nut it beats driving to Swindon, our nearest big town. I hate Swindon!

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  6. Agreed, it is so patronising!

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  7. Haven't used them but can empathise with such ridiculous behaviour!

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  8. Fortunately I've never bought anything from a company with such an approach. It smacks of patronising sexism to me. Presumably most of their customers are women. If Screwfix said that they'd get a fair few metaphorical punches on the nose.

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    1. GB, oddly I hadn't thought of that. It really is sexist, isn't it

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  9. I've been referred to as 'Valued Customer' on several occasions, but nothing quite on this level. They sound desperate.

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    1. Valued customer is ok, CM. Just. But Boden are unique (at least in my experience).

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  10. What winds me up is when you submit your order to certain companies, then get about twenty emails, We've received your order! We've accepted your order! Your order is with our warehouse! We're processing your order! We're getting your order ready to send! Here's yet another update on your order blah blah! I just want to know they've got it and they've sent it!

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  11. I've always been reluctant to buy online, but recently sent for three items via snail mail from Cotton Traders. Two weeks later I received a letter to say two items were not available and the third would be dispatched asap. Still no parcel and I am trusting they will refund my cheque which I paid up front. Never again.

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    1. Maggie, you're getting as bad as I am. I have no recollection of replying to Teresa's comment, above, and you've written the same kind of comment twice! But thank you all the same.

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  12. I'm not going bonkers but think my smart phone might be. I sent the first message which didn't appear when I looked again. Sorry.

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