Sunday, 19 July 2015

Dear physiotherapist





You're a nice girl, and undoubtedly you know your stuff, but when I come to you with an ankle ligament injury, I don't necessarily want to be told the following:

 My right calf is bigger than my left.
So? Am is supposed to care? Is there anything I should do about it? No? Then let's forget it can we? It seems to me quite irrelevant.

I can't stand on tiptoe. 
I already know this. I told you last week. It's due to nerve damage from one of my spinal fractures. But I really don't mind. It's a long time since I felt the need to stand on tiptoe. In fact I didn't even know I couldn't do it before the last physio explained it to me. Years ago. I leave this kind of things to my dancing granddaugher, P (the only member of my family who reads this). Say hallo to everyone, P!

My back is stiff
Of course my back is stiff! I've broken it twice (see above), and one vertebra is viertually entirely missing. You know that, too. And no, I don't want to do any more exercises for it, thank you. A stiff back is now part of who I am.

My knees turn out (or is it in? I can't remember)
This hasn't impeded me in any way, either. Look, I'm getting older. Things go wrong. I don't want you to discover any more evidence of decrepitude.

Now. Please can we get back to my ankle? After all, that's what I came about...



19 comments:

  1. That all sounds annoying! "And your point is?" Is my answer to such situations.

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    1. Quite. But I was too polite to say it!

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  2. My right calf is also bigger than my left. I do find this slightly annoying because my reasonably tight-fitting gum boots always tell me so.

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    1. I have no trouble with boots. In fact this so-called problem doesn't affect me at all.

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  3. Now one could of course argue that it speaks for your physiotherapist that she does not only look at one isolated part of your body, but sees you as a whole, more or less successful combination of bones, ligaments, joints and so on. Actually, my physiotherapist (whom I have not needed to see in years, thanks to having found the right combination of exercise and proper matress for me) does that, too, and I would be rather annoyed if he had never looked at the entire set up. It's all connected, isn't it, and he managed to make me better only because he treated me as one big orthopaedic catastrophe.
    Sure, you don't want to hear the same comments from your physiotherapist over and over again, so after she's pointed out those things to you once, that should certainly be enough.

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    1. Meike, you're right, or course. But you take me too seriously. Much of what I write can be taken with a big pinch of salt! Although she did spend an inordinate amount of time pointing out these defects....

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  4. I used to live with a girl that stood with her toes pointing in like this. She never had any trouble skiing which I could never understand.

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    1. Adrian, she had the right idea. That's how skiers stop. I never mastered it, and had to sit down instead. which was painful.

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  5. Hope you got the ankle attended to in the end, Frances!

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    1. It's much better now thanks,, Rosemary.

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  6. Now who said that nurses make the worst patients? Can't be true, surely!

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    1. No. Doctors are by far the worst patients ...

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    2. Maggie, I'm actually quite a good patient. Henry, I think you may be right. Although the googlers of symptoms must come pretty near the top?

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  7. This is obviously grump week.

    I went to the physio about my back. He sorted my foot (which I thought was fine) and that sorted my back.

    Do you have pepper on your strawberries? You should try it. Delicious.

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    1. No. But I had a friend who used to have peper on his strawberries. My sister poured Worcester sauce on hers by mistake a couple of weeks ago, but rinsed it off. Another missed opportunity?

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  8. Sigh. Sounds like you had someone who didn't pay attention to your history. :-/

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  9. Spot on ;) Just about sums up why I still haven't got round to even try seeing anyone about my knee...

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