The quest for eternal youth (or sausages)

John likes to buy things he's seen "written up". Books, vitamins, The Knife*, even sausages - anything highly recommended by what he considers to be a reputable source - come winging their way to us through the post, at considerable expense. We(yes. I join him. After all, he's paying) take/use/eat whatever it is for a while, then because we aren't living any longer or being less tired or whatever, he forgets to re-order, and another life-enhancing idea bites the dust.

Yesterday, four little parcels arrived from Switzerland containing a magic (and I suspect very expensive) liquid claiming to contain all the elements, minerals etc he needs (and which he's probably already getting). He has to weigh himself to calculate exactly how much he needs to take, and then off he goes on another quest for eternal youth or whatever (he's forgotten what this stuff is supposed to do because the journey from Switzerland has taken so long).

I shall not be joining him in this. Life's too short (with the magic stuff, it may be a tad longer, but I'm prepared to risk that), and I can't be bothered to do all that weighing and measuring. But I wish him luck.

*The very expensvie Knife, mentioned in a previous post and without which apparently no chef would dream of taking to his chopping board, and which lurks at the bottom of the washing-up bowl and has already bitten me three times.