Wednesday, 8 August 2012

Going anywhere nice for your holidays?

Isn't that a stupid question? What are you supposed to say? "No. This year we decided to go somewhere really nasty"?

This is, of course, hairdresser-speak. Safe, but dull. And, as I said, stupid.

But my hairdresser and I always end up talking about sex. I've no idea why. It doesn't start out that way. It's an all-roads-lead-to kind of thing. We aren't flirting. He's about the same age as my son. It's just the way it is. We also talk about fast cars and what we'd do if we won the lottery, but it invariably ends with sex.

At this point, all around us, scissors and voices are dropped so that everyone else can listen in, and they all stop talking about the nice places where they're going on holiday, which has to be a good thing. So really, we're doing them all a favour.

What do you talk about when you're having your hair cut (bald readers need not reply)?

20 comments:

  1. Since I am not bald, I suppose I qualify for a reply :-)
    My hairdresser and I have something in common; we have both become widows rather young, and sometimes we talk about our late husbands. She also tells me about her in-laws, who live in Canada, and how difficult her mother-in-law was when she learnt that the young woman is in a relationship with a man again (after years of being single). Of course she wants to maintain a good relationship to the in-laws, since they are the grandparents of her children, but last time we talked, she was hardly on speaking terms with her mother-in-law. How glad I am that Mary is very different!
    Other than that, we talk about the safe subjects of work... and yes, of holidays :-)

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  2. My hairdresser 'does' hair to help support her passion of breeding and racing American Quarter Horses. In her younger days she was an open-wheel race car driver. So we have lively racing conversations as well as those personal reflections that come from long standing friendship.

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    1. A horsey hairdresser! Lucky you. Sounds just up my alley (bridlepath).

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  3. I happen to be almost bald and wear wigs but I'll reply anyway because I was asked this same question - Going anywhere nice for your holidays - by a dental hygienist. There's no answer when you've a mouthful of dental implements.

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    1. I always ask the hygienist to tell me about her holiday,Lynne, because, as you say, it's impossible to talk about my own.

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  4. Oh, Frances, I was waiting to hear the details! :)

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    1. Oh, not in the public domain, Jenny. I'd probably be arrested. And he has a wife and children to think about...

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  5. It is rather like the sign Fresh Eggs. Is someone really going to say that they are selling stale ones?

    I have so little hair that the conversation goes something like "What would you like done with your hair today?" to which I reply something "Whatever you can do with the half dozen of them."

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    1. GB, could I respectfully suggest that there must be a way of transposing some of that magnificent beard onto...? No. Perhpas not.

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  6. I was thinking about this the other day when I asked one of the borrowers the same question. I think it's just if they say they're going somewhere it seems rude to demand: 'where are you going?' (although that is the traditional greeting in parts of the Congo... but I digress). Last time I was at the hairdressers she got so excited talking about her trip to Vegas that she left me lop-sided and we both forgot I need my neanderthal neck shaved! Which is why I look the way I do.

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    1. Clare, it's the same kind of thing as when shop assistants say "what were you looking for?" (as though you no longer are) rather than a brisk "what do you want?" That one's always puzzled me.

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  7. My hairdresser set herself up in her garage - and I thought it would be a bit grotty. But it is a very stylish (albeit small) professional salon - and much cheaper than the high street. I'm afraid the banter is very ordinary. I'm sure it would be much livlier if she were a man. Lucky you!

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  8. I hate it when my hairdresser talks to me at all. I'd rather she concentrated on how to make the best of my greying hair. I really don't like being at the hairdresser to be honest. That's a loooooong time in front of a mirror ...

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    1. Oh, that bloody mirror! One of ears sticks out, and the hairdresser's is the only place I notice it. And the wrinkles, of course, and and....I think that's why I need to keep talking.

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  9. I get them to talk about their kids - I don't have any so it's useful research.

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    1. Mine has two, but we don't talk about them much.

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  10. Her small son and whether to send him to play school ... I'm thinking of saying NO! next time , instead , just to liven the conversation up a bit ( anyway , now I've retired , I don't feel obliged to drum up trade any more ) .

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  11. If she's not sure whether to send him to playschool then she probably shouldn't. I think we get rid of our kids far too early nowadays (I did, but am not sure I was right, though it seemed a wonderful idea at the time!).

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