Monday, 19 May 2014

A small but satisfactory triumph

Do the words "self-assemby" strike terror into your  hearts? Of course, if one were to be pernickerty  - perish the thought - the words should mean that the item in question, upon its release from its mountains of packaging, jumps to it and assembles itself, but no matter.  It doesn't. And when the chair illustrated - that actual chair - arrived, it was in a flat box. Flat. Hmm.

John and I are not handy. Not at all. No DIY for us, but DISEPASAP (do it somebody else, please, as  soon as possible). So, the box sat in the hallway for a few hours, while we thought about it. But we couldn't leave it like that, and in the absence of handy sons (where are you, B, when I need you?), it was up to us. Me, as it happens.

Reader, I assembled it. No bad words passed my lips, not even when I found that there were not one but two kinds of screws, varying ever so slightly in size, and I'd used the wrong ones in the wrong (right?) place. The instructions, such as they were, were all in pictures, so no useful words to assist me. But notwithstanding interruptions (son asking for chicken stew recipe; neighbour locking herself out of her house. That kind of thing), it was finished in...well... it was finshed anyway.

My biggest mistake was to assemble it downstairs, rather than in situ, thus having to lug it up two flights of stairs, putting both myself and chair at risk (I wanted to surprise John, which was why I didn't ask for help. He nearly got a bigger surprise than I'd planned. I have a history of breaking my back falling downstairs).

That's all. Just a little boast (I don't expect anyone who doesn't know me to be in the least impressed).

26 comments:

  1. I'm impressed. It is a unique achievement to assemble any kit without swearing.

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    1. I know. And I'm pretty foul mouthed at best!

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  2. I think I have the exact same model, and mine was given as a present. Top of my annual 'resolutions' list is never to buy any self-assembly anything; does it happen? No.

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    1. CM, I find there's no choice. Nearly everything comes in bits now.

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  3. I am impressed, especially with the lugging upstairs of the chair. Every Saturday when I want to wipe the floors here, I lug my desk chair on top of my bed, which is only an arm's length away from the desk, and that is always a mini challenge for me.
    As for the assembling: I hold the (unofficial) title of IKEA Furniture Assembling Champion of Baden-Württemberg, so...

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    1. Wow! I've impressed an expert. How satisfying.

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  4. I have just given a chair like that away! could have saved you some bother....but then again you wouldn't have had the chance to do such a good job and be so rightly proud..well done!

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  5. Well done. I'm not good at that kind of thing myself.

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  6. Snap - so I am impressed! We recently bought a desk chair too and it arrived in a flat pack. The only way we got it up without losing tempers was to do it together, following the instructions exactly. It worked!

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    1. It's quite satisfying, Rosemary, isn't it? But I still don't like it!

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  7. Well done! I am very impressed - especially with you managing to lug it up two flights of stairs x

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  8. I'm impressed too. Assembling, possibly - if not too heavy. Lugging anything upstairs, no way. My office chair that I bought a year or two ago - delivered fully assembled and I bet the guy used the lift! - is so heavy I have problems even moving it off and back on the carpet when vaccuming...

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    1. Thank you, DT. I feel even better now!

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  9. I'm hugely impressed and it was so lovely to surprise your husband. I would never have been able to finish the job unaided, especially with the interruptions, although I'm sure I would have assembled it downstairs too. I'm relieved you didn't hurt yourself and hope the chair is a big success. xx

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    1. Joanna, I have to confess that he did hold things in place, and also made encouraging noises!

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  10. I leave all assembly to my husband. I have no interest in or aptitude for it and so I am very impressed indeed, Frances.

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    1. Wendy, my late husband was brilliant at that kind of thing, too, and his sons have inherited the ability. John is wonderful, but...

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  11. When I commented upon your post In Praise of Those With Practical Skills I said that I felt guilty about having them (and as you didn't comment on my comment I felt that I must have struck a sore point). Now I feel even more guilty as I, and those like me, would seem to be in a minority amongst your Blogland followers.

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    1. But now you're trying to pass the guilt on to me, for failing to comment on your comment, GB. Never feel bad about having practical skills. People like me NEED people like you.

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    2. PS I never saw your comment to comment on, but I have now. So thank you!

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    3. Thank you Frances. It's good to be wanted. It's even better to be needed. Or it could be the other way around. Qui sait.I had a feeling yoiu hadn't seen my other comment. Late comments are often missed by people.

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  12. Finally up to date with your blog after a broken femur and 6 days in hospital, so this blog is all the more relevant. I only tripped off the lawn, so goodness knows what you could have done. DIY and anything else we do, has to be carefully thought through. Beware the innocent garden mower.

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    1. Oh, poor you, Maggie! I hope you're feeling better now.

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