The novel is almost finished. I have a misty vision of the perfect, satisfying (but not too satisfying) ending. So I'm not getting down to it (many writers will understand this syndrome). Much better to leave it where it is, pregnant with brilliant possibilities, than actually to do it, and face disillusion.
I love our larder. I love being able to walk in and see exactly what there is, rather than open lots of drawers and cupboards. But it's a long time since I could see what there was in our larder. Plus, it needed a good clean.
I have to say, I've had a horrible afternoon. An afternoon of long-ago sell-by dates*, of scatterings of rice grains and crumbs, and, strangely, multiple half-used packs of toasted almonds. There was insect life, too. Silverfish, and what may have been weevils. Adrian would have photographed them. I just cleaned carefully round them. Oh, and a huge jar of pickled gherkins, which I once needed for a recipe, but which over time had morphed into what looked like primitive, grey amphibians.
The job is now done. Do I feel satisfied, now that everything is in neat rows and and least some things are still within their sell-by dates? Not at all. I just feel tired, my back aches, and I still haven't finished that novel.
*I once had, and treasured, a tin of anchovies dated 1987. I think they belonged to my father. I wonder what happened to them.
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I would be feeling much better after such a marathon clear-out, exhilarated even. That's why you are a successful novelist and I'm not. Hope this novel is going to be an actual book that I can buy?
ReplyDeleteOnly time will tell Maggie...
DeleteWell the almost end of the novel is crackin' good news. Some years ago friends stayed in my house when I was in New Zealand for the usual six months and took it upon themselves to clear anything I had that was out of date. I thought that was going a bit far. I've since remedied the situation.
ReplyDeleteGood for you, Graham!
DeleteI have built a very large larder at the barn we're STILL working on. They are much neglected rooms in present times, but something that should be revived.
ReplyDeleteI quite agree, Cro. Time was when larders were commonplace.
DeleteNo larder in this house, but then again, a single household like mine who very rarely cooks doesn't need one. Of course you are not surprised to hear that I would have loved to do that job for you, Frances!
ReplyDeleteHopefully, you'll write that "perfect, satisfying (but not too satisfying" ending soon and we'll get to read another one of your books soon!
Meike, not in my wildest dreams would I have let you see my larder. You would have been appalled.
DeleteWishing you great success with your ending, Frances, and I sympathise with both the need to walk away from it for a while and also with the lack of satisfaction at the end of the larder cleaning.
ReplyDeleteUndoubtedly though, the right, true end will have been brewing in your mind while you wiped around weevils and unearthed previously undiscovered pickled life forms.I once found a lot of strange living creatures in an empty bottle of red wine that, for some obscure reason, I had tucked away. They were growing out of the sediment and the smell was terrible. My daughters ran out of the house screaming.
I'm really looking forward to your novel and feeling excited about it. xxx
Joanna, I wish I shared your excitement...but thank you for your kind words.
DeleteIt is a great feeling when all the out of date/leaking packets etc. have been thrown out and there is once again space on the shelves, though it never seems to last long ( the space). Please write a " satisfying" ending. I dislike reading a great book, only to have it totally spoilt by a rubbish ending. No pressure !
ReplyDeleteFrances, I think endings are terribly hard. I read a lot of new books, and many are ruined by the ending. Either the "oh...was that it?" thing, or the too pat and neat endings seem to prevail. But I'll try to be satsifying. Only two more people to kill off....
DeleteWould be nice to have a larder but I do have other cupboards and drawers to attack when in the mood for that sort of thing ;)
ReplyDeleteAh, but do you do it, DT?
DeleteI can wait for the book but don't be too long.
ReplyDeleteSilverfish are fine but weevils need popping in the bin.
I'm not sure there really were weevils, Adrian, but there were certainly silverfish. I managed not to make any "do no weevil" jokes in my post. Damn. Now I've done it...
DeleteEveryone who has ever written an essay knows what it is to fumble about at the end. 'I fell out of bed and woke myself up" gets a bit old.
ReplyDeleteI remember how satisfying it was to grasp the idea of writing down scraps of thoughts and paragraphs to marshal into some semblance of order and grace later. Writing a great ending and steering towards it is much easier than finding the ending at the end.
I think my steering is a bit wonky, ER. I tend not to plot, but make it up as I go along. But this is a murder novel; new territory for me.
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