Sunday 10 February 2013

Magpie 155



For February the Twelfth - A 21st. Anniversary

We were young, newly-married,and money was in very short supply. Just once a week we went out, to the local pub, where (occasionally, if we were feeling flush) we ran to chicken and chips.

I remember so clearly you saying one night, as we stood at the bar:"just think - one day one of us is going to die in the other's arms!"

But it didn't happen that way, did it? On the morning you died, when the hospital phoned to tell me to come at once, I had to arrange for someone to care for the children, and then the car wouldn't start and I was late. Too late. So instead of dying in my arms, you died in a hospital ward surrounded by strangers.

I have sat with many people as they died, but I wasn't with you.

I can't even tell you I'm sorry.



(This is a sad time of year for me, and this picture immediately brought this memory to mind. Thanks to Tess at Magpie Tales for the picture)

41 comments:

  1. oh that is very sad not to be with a loved one when they die. Well written from your heart.

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  2. A sobering reminder to us all that life doesn't always turn out as we expect it to. Will think of you on 12th and you must think happy thoughts of lovely times.

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    1. Thanks, Wendy. I do have the memories, as you say, and the children, who are a part of him (one is almost a clone!).

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  3. sorry for you loss. i hope you have good memories too

    Initiated Kiss

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  4. My heart goes out to you .... words fail me right now.

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  5. The picture is beautiful. I can imagine how it made you feel. Your words are deeply moving. They will stay with me for a along time. I'm so sorry.

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    1. Thank you, Joanna. I suppose it was a bit self-indulgent, but writing a few words does help.

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  6. Frances, this is so sad. I'm sorry you didn't make it in time, but please think of all the happy memories you have and try not to dwell on this.

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  7. Oh so very sorry for such a horrible thing to happen at such a sad time..... hang tightly NOW to those fond warm memories that makes your heart sing with joy at the thought of them!

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  8. We can't beat ourselves up forever over the "coulda, woulda, shoulda's." We must hold onto all that was good. In heaven there is no blame, no regrets, only joy and love as we reunite with those who left us much to early. Thank you for touching me with your words.

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  9. Sorry you didn't make it in time but I'm sure he knew you loved him. Hold onto the good memories.

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  10. So sad.....and unexpected.....so sorry.

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  11. Wistful melancholy. Beautifully expressed.

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  12. Oh my...so sad and poignant! Tender and sweet
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  13. That is very sad. It happens, I think, to many of us.

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    1. I think it happened to me before any of my friends, Yvonne. Now, I try to remember their anniversaries.

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  14. Sad; and reminds me of my parents... (who also died without the 'proper' goodbyes)

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    1. There's rarley time or opportunity to say goodbye, is there?

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  15. It's hard not to have the closure we would have wanted, especially when the love runs so deep.

    Sorry it went down that way.

    "/

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    1. But at least I had 21 years with him. Thank you, Sue.

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  16. So sad. So beautifully expressed.

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  17. Far cry from your usual Mags, therefore twice as poignant. :)

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    1. Thanks, Jinksy. It wasnt planned, but just....happened.

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  18. Hugs to you. Thanks for sharing your heart with us. I'm so sorry for your loss but glad you wrote this.

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  19. Oh Frances - so sad am I for you my friend. It is heartbreaking when we miss the final goodbye of someone we love so dearly.

    My thoughts are with you at this sad time for you.

    Loads hugs. Anna

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  20. Thanks, Anna. Hugs are always good!

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  21. It's perfectly understandable to act within sad times if it's how your heart needs to write! I never made it to say goodbye to my mother and even after all these years it's still difficult to reflect upon.

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