Tuesday, 10 July 2018

One of my greatest achievements!

After about thirty years of people patiently explaining, I finally understand the off-side rule, just in time for the big match tomorrow! My helpers have, over the years, tried to explain,  usually using salt and pepper pots to demonstrate who stands where when whatever it is happens, but until today  it has remained a mystery. But no more!

If anyone would like me to explain, just bring your own salt and pepper and I'll be more than happy to help. I'll even give you a cup of coffee.

You're welcome.

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15 comments:

  1. Adrian Ward11 July 2018 at 04:43

    I have little interest in Wendyball. I hope England win but that is as far as it goes.
    A striker who came from Devizes,
    Did little to help to win prizes,
    When asked for a reason,
    He said, 'Well, this season,
    My boots were of two different sizes!'

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    Replies
    1. Librarian11 July 2018 at 09:52

      Love it, Adrian!!

      Delete
    2. Graham Edwards12 July 2018 at 09:16

      Excellent, Adrian.

      Delete
    3. Adrian Ward12 July 2018 at 10:40

      I didn't compose it. I just recalled it.

      Delete
    4. Frances Garrood12 July 2018 at 16:37

      Adrian, I was so disappointed to read that the limerick isn't your own! But it's a good one. Our neighbour has an entire book of Devizes limericks.

      Delete
  2. Frances11 July 2018 at 08:25

    I would love to join you for coffee ( if you weren't so far away!) but having reached my( nearly )old age without knowing or caring about the offside rule......I will keep it that way thanks ! Enjoy the match.

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    Replies
    1. Frances Garrood12 July 2018 at 16:38

      Thanks, Frances. I can't say I enjoyed the match. I think Croatia deserved to win. Sadly.

      Delete
  3. Librarian11 July 2018 at 09:53

    I shall be watching at my sister's. The Moment Germany kicked itself out of this World Cup, I started cheering for England. During my normal daily life, the footie has no relevance at all, but World Cup Matches with either Germany or England playing are an exception.

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    Replies
    1. Frances Garrood12 July 2018 at 16:38

      Meike, I think England got a bit further than they really deserved, much as I hate to say it.

      Delete
  4. Kay G.11 July 2018 at 13:53

    Good for you! I depend on someone to point it out. Go England!

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    Replies
    1. Frances Garrood12 July 2018 at 16:39

      Go England indeed, Kay. By the time I read your reply, they'd gone!

      Delete
  5. Graham Edwards12 July 2018 at 09:18

    In days of yore when I was a linesman I knew the offside rule better than I knew the back of my hand. It was amazing how many players didn't know it though.

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    Replies
    1. Frances Garrood12 July 2018 at 16:41

      I can understand it, Graham, but when players are moving about I can't actually detect it. Maybe by the time the World Cup comes around again...

      Delete
  6. Keith Havers14 July 2018 at 09:15

    It's very simple. If the linesman puts his flag up then they're offside.

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    Replies
    1. Frances Garrood14 July 2018 at 15:14

      Hm. That's all well and good, Keith, but I wanted to know WHY! But thanks anyway.

      Delete

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