"What I ate yesterday."

It's a regular article in our newpaper suppplement. They take someone well-know (whom I've never hear of), and ask them what they ate yesterday. How dull is that? These people are Important and Busy, so they "snatch" a bit of sushi or a smoothie (why do I hate that word?), eat lots of vegetables and salad, and dine somewhere posh in the evening. Between whiles, they dash about going to meetings and/or being filmed.

So I shall bore you with what I ate yesterday (not, as it happens, a good day to choose, but no matter).

Breakfast: Fruit and Fibre. I bought this by mistake, and it's horrible (sorry, Kellogs). But my expectations of breakfast are mercifully low.

Lunch: a cheese and tomato roll. And an orange (I eat a lot of oranges).

Dinner: a ready meal. I am not proud of this, and do it rarely. He had a huge curry. I had a small shepherd's pie. Normally, I make stuff, but was having my toenails painted blue (long story) so didn't have time to cook. Another orange.

Later on: an apple. And chocolate. Oh, and wine.

At this stage in the article, a dietician comments. I have no dietitian, and want no criticial assessment of my eating habits. I know what I'm doing wrong, and am too old to care.

Now. What did you eat yesterday? (No cheating, please. I am not a dietician, so you have nothing to fear.)