Tuesday 26 October 2010

Rant on a wet Tuesday

Two things really annoyed me today.

1. Nick Clegg smokes! Shock, horror. How could he, when we're all looking to him to set a good example? What ridiculous, tabloid bollocks. Of course the poor bloke can smoke if he wants to. Why on earth shouldn't he? It's not illegal, or hurting anyone else (unless he blows smoke in the baby's face). I've never smoked, but I will defend - well not to the death, but I'll defend - anyone else's right to do so.

2. "Five-a-day"*. Why does that annoy me so much? I was reading in the paper something about a fruity drink, and was told that "it also counts as one of your five a day". Do they (whoever they are) really think we all sit around counting up to five, and then breathing a sigh of relief before reaching for the chocolate/cake/pork pie or whatever. It makes me want to eat anything but five a day. Three, eight, seventeen - anything but five. And how many peas (for example) make a helping? How much cabbage? Does half an avocado count? Does anyobody know? Does anybody CARE?

* For anyone who doesn't know (can there be anyone?), the government recommends that we all eat five helpings of fruit and/or veg a day.


  1. 1) There are times I wish I smoked just because this stuff frustrates me so much I want to thumb my nose at them. Those are usually the time my wife smacks me with a frying pan.

    2) I've always wondered who it is that walks around with a tally sheet in their pocket. Apparently it's not you. I'll cross your name off that tally sheet, which I do carry around in my pocket.

  2. Agree totally about smoking. I've never smoked but I feel that a chunk of society has been targeted. Although the ban in public places and transport has made life a lot more comfortable for me, I don't see why they can't have their own rooms in pubs and clubs.

    My five-a-day are:
    1. Red wine
    2. White wine
    3. Chips
    4. Mushy peas
    5. Tomato ketchup

  3. Not sure about the mushy peas or the ketchup, but you have exactly the right idea, Keith. I would include best bitter, pork scratchings and jam doughnuts. Perhaps we should start a new five-a-day campaign; a choose-your-own five-a-day?

  4. You five-a-day comment made me laugh. I agree utterly. Does anybody real care?!

    Although I'm a veggie and probably eat about fifteen-a-day!

  5. Hi, Akasha. I'd happily be a vegetarian if I didn't have to spend so much time feeding carnivores.